The urge and pressure to
practice what i see in the video
increase with each passing
hour i couldn’t it resist
anymore.I couldn’t stand it
anymore.
I was at home one certain day
when Amaka,a girl in our street
came to deliver a message to
my own mother but
unfortunately,she wasn’t
around.My elder siblings were
not around too.The junior ones
were playing outside the
compound.
“Is there any message for
her?”i asked amaka who made
to leave,since whom she came
looking for was not around.
“Don’t worry i will come back
again for her”she said.The
urge started again because i
was actually watching the
videos before she came.I felt
like grabbing her,to practice
what i have been watching
with her.As she made to leave,i
held her hand.I knew she
didn’t understand.
“what?”she asked.
I laughed”nothing”i said.
This continued happening to
me.
Three years passed and i was
thirteen.It was at this stage
that my friends taught me how
to talk to a girl to have her as a
girlfriend.
I followed every step they gave
me and got myself one.It was
with her that i started pratising
the things i do watch both on
the television and on the
phone.
I brought home pornographic
videos to watch each time i
was alone.Nobody ever
noticed.I learnt how to use the
internet.Each time i logged into
the internet,i visited site that
contained adult materials.
I became so addicted to
pornography.My brain was
filled with naked pictures.My
imaginations and
everything.My academic
performances depreciated to
the core.
I knew i was in a serious trouble.I couldn’t
concentrate on anything else apart from the
porn videos.
It happened that one day in the church,i almost
disgraced myself.I saw a girl who was not
properly covered.She looked like one of those
girls in the bad films i watch.My mind started
telling me to go closer to her.I stood up and
started going.I was few steps away from her
when my senses came back to me.Then i
realised i was in the church.Everybody was
seated while i was standing.I saw pairs of eyes
on me.I bent down to look at the ground as if i
actually came to inspect something there.Then
i went back to my seat.
The urge to have sex increased in me.I couldn’t
stay a day without thinking about it.
I knew i brought this problem upon myself and i
didn’t know of how to stop.I was deeply
addicted and i never imagined if i can ever
break free from it.
One of my major problems came like a rude
shock to me the day i saw a woman dragging
her daughter to our compound,shouting
“You are useless.you are a disgrace.you must
show me who impregnated you today”
I Knew i was in serious trouble.It was my
handwork.And to worsen everything,my mothers
and siblings were around.My father too who
returned few days ago was around too.
I felt like disappearing but it was too late
because i saw the girl pointing at me.
“He is the one”she said
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